mind reviewing my essay?

well, since Net Demon wrote one, i thought i'll give it a try myself. Here's mine:

The blank monitor. The phone line disconnected from the modem. The silence from the computer is almost deafening.

It's too much. The temptation is too high.

The power button pressed on, the machine slowly came to life. A slight hum, and the monitor lights up, slowly showing the interface. Connect to the internet.

Verifying. Registering. Authenticating. Connected.

In real life, no matter who you are, there are always limitations placed upon you. There are rules and regulations, laws. All placed no matter what and where.

But you're online. What's there to stop you?

No limitations whatsoever. You can break into computers in Singapore, while laughing about it with a hacker in Indonesia. Discuss programming ideas with a Russian virus coder about your creations. Bitch on how unfair the world is with an American anarchist. Crack programs made in the UK, transfer it to a courier in Australia, who'll upload it to a server in Sweden, for your group based in Canada.

It's fun. It's a big party, and it seems that almost everyone you knew came from a different part of the world.You've traveled the world, without even diverting your eyes from the screen, without even stepping outside your room.

But, without realizing it, you're actually losing out in life. To much of your time is spent perfecting your online persona, and very little is spent on growing up. The barriers actually have one simple purpose: To tell us what consists of acceptable behavior. Online, the only barriers can be broken by becoming smarter, which only does nothing more but inflate a person's ego.

You have to control it. Learn to compartmentalize, to balance both lives. It seems impossible at first, but eventually you will succeed. Once you have managed to do that, you'll see the best of both worlds and consider how lucky you are to be part of both.

It's sexy and I enjoyed it.

thanks.

Yeah, rate: Very Good! Enjoyed it very much! ^^

honestly, im not sure if i agree with the essay. it was well written, but i think that just because you have an online persona and spend most of your time online (god know's i do) that you miss out on life. its a personal choice. this may be the world you want to live in. and simply because you spend all your time online, doesn't mean you lose connection with the real world. doesn't mean you never grow and mature.

not trying to shoot down your article, just offering a counter perspective.

-samurai

only_samurai wrote: honestly, im not sure if i agree with the essay. it was well written, but i think that just because you have an online persona and spend most of your time online (god know's i do) that you miss out on life. its a personal choice. this may be the world you want to live in. and simply because you spend all your time online, doesn't mean you lose connection with the real world. doesn't mean you never grow and mature.

not trying to shoot down your article, just offering a counter perspective.

-samurai

thanks for the opinion.

well if you wrote that for an English paper you would fail.

i like the idea and organization of content but the mechanics are wrong

if it's for English, i'd be writing much better pieces, and I'm top in my English class.

this is just for kicks. thanks for the opinion, though.